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no kitchen, no living room, no garden, shared bathroom

We charge_____ we make profits of_____.

very very cramped

You will be banned from using the kitchen and can you wash your clothes in the sink

Let available date: You will be transferred into this isolated hotel with a bunch of strangers when we decide ad without warning
Let Type: a very very small room
Furnish type: dirty, bed-bug ridden bed

Property Type: hotel room
Bedrooms: 1
Bathrooms: shared with ___ many people.

MEARS is proud to bring to market this gorgeous SHIT HOLE

MEARS is proud to bring to market this gorgeous period SHIT HOLE. We don’t care about you or your BASIC HUMANITY. We are truly delighted to TAKE GOVERNMENT FUNDING to LINE OUR POCKETS whilst continually treating you WITH AS LITTLE DIGNITY AND RESPECT AS WE CAN.

Located in the ever-popular VERY OUTSKIRTS of Glasgow. This property is closely situated to NO GREEN SPACE and THE MOTORWAY, providing you with a stunning view of A BRICK WALL.

BLACK MOULD leaves the walls with a unique and original pattern. The BESPOKE FRIDGE is made from FOUND PARTS and will suddenly turn off at various points leaving your FOOD SPOILED.

This 8th floor flat is accessed via AN UN-COVID SAFE CRAMPED COMMUNAL AREA which leads to a SMALL HALLWAY and OUT-OF-ORDER LIFT. Recently refurbished to a VERY LOW STANDARD using the very CHEAPEST OF MATERIALS.

Local area:

In addition, the location of the property is TERRIBLE! It is just a few minutes walk away from THE M8 with NO PUBLIC TRANSPORT links, there are NO local amenities, but the scenic CREMATORIUM is within easy walking distance providing some respite from your CRAMPED and DEPRESSING accommodation.

If you have any issues with your property please contact: PHONE LINES ARE CURRENTLY DOWN :) 2021