Looking for TOTAL ISOLATION and LACK OF BASIC HUMAN RIGHTS then this is the property for you!

Let available date: After your sudden and random dispersal from somewhere else in the UK in the middle of the night to this new city you’ve never been to before and have no support in
Let Type: single hotel room
Furnish type: some furniture

Property Type: You’ll be lucky to have your own room here
Bedrooms: 1
Bathrooms: shared with ___ many people.

Viewings at the property will be available AFTER YOUR SUDDEN AND RANDOM DISPERSAL IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT, please submit PROOF OF YOUR CLAIM via our website and the home office in the first instance.

STUNNING single HOTEL ROOM now available. This stunning property has been compared to a DETENTION CENTRE and comes with UNCLEAN SHEETS, PEELING WALLPAPER and AN ODD SMELL.

We here at MEARS are PROUD to offer you the opportunity to be LOCKED IN A TINY ROOM for an indefinite amount of time. We offer NO VULNERABILITY CHECKS as well as NO ACCESS TO HEALTHCARE. The perfect place to PUT YOUR MENTAL HEALTH UNDER HUGE STRAIN.

With BARELY ENOUGH ROOM TO STRETCH OUT YOUR ARMS this property is the ideal place to spend HOURS IN ISOLATION without any form of entertainment. In addition to this we want to ensure you that here at MEARS we DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR WELFARE.

If you have any issues with your property please contact: PHONE LINES ARE CURRENTLY DOWN :)